I did a total hatchet job on this guy yesterday, and now my blog is blowing up like crazy. I'm not surprised that my meanest-spirited work would be my most popular, but the layers of irony are quite deep. I won't try to penetrate them all, as I normally would, in my navel-gazing way, but the main irony is that I went off on this guy because I was suspicious about how he got so much traffic on his mediocre (let's face it) blog. He ended up emailing me and saying that I had hurt him real bad, man, and that a lot of his success had to do with "The Secret," (he wrote all about it on his blog today) as well as his whole positive, empowering message blahblahblah. And he said that I could get the universe to do my bidding too, if I would only watch "The Secret" on DVD, available through Amazon.com for $9.99. Meanwhile, I manage to get a bunch of traffic on my little blog by sneaking up and shanking the biggest guy on the cellblock (that thing I just did was a gangsta metaphor--something we mommybloggers love almost more than unicorns.) See. Irony.
So I feel a little dirty about the whole episode. Which is not to say you shouldn't read yesterday's attack. You should. But that's not what I normally do here. I write a lot of too-long-for-the-genre funny/reflective/irono-serious stuff, stories about kids and dogs, sanctimonious social critiques, and post lots of pictures and videos of the cutest freakin' twins in the world. Like so:
The universe has already done my bidding, yo.