Tuesday, December 28, 2010

I can tell I'm a parent because my Christmas cards are lame

Despite my lack of Christmas spirit, I’ve been in the habit of writing holiday update letters to send out to friends and family for the better part of the last decade.  This started as a modest undertaking, but over time has become a bit of a competition between my current self and previous years’ selves, to pack as much information, humor, and incisive social commentary as possible into two pages of single-spaced, 8-point sans serif.

Last year’s letter was as elaborate and dense as a mail-order fruitcake, and probably devoured with just as much enthusiasm by its recipients.

Read more... 


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I'm over at Aiming Low today, and you should totally go over there and read and bitch about the lame cards you got this Christmas.  But as a Beta Dad exclusive, here are some pics from Christmas, taken by my ridiculously talented sister-in-law:
 

29 comments:

  1. OMG!. Your SIL rocks, lame xmas cards? Use these photos as next year's.

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  2. Looks like they had fun!

    Being lame is a natural side effect of being a parent. It comes out with the placenta and gets all over you and peroxide doesn't get it out.

    Your welcome for the visual.

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  3. Awww! An "I wuv my sister" pic! I don't have any of those, but we took video of them swatting each other with cardboard tubes (they're tweens.)

    Christmas cards with just the kids on them depress me a little. I always want to say "Hey, I wanna know how YOU'RE doing too."

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  4. Read and enjoyed your post over at Aiming Low... but readers over there have not experienced the Galactic Twin Cuteness you've provided here. Well played, Beta...

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  5. Ah, the "read more" took me to Aiming Low! NICE! I felt a little bit tricked, but it was a subtle, gentle escort, I have to say.

    I came back here to comment because your kids are SO CUTE I wanted to be closer to them.

    That top one, with the something something aperture blurry background, s'pretty.

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  6. Those pictures are beautiful.

    Glad you had a nice Christmas.

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  7. @KBF--My SIL took the pics for our photo card the last two years, and they were great. It's just the text in the letter that's getting lame. And you're right, she totally rocks.

    @Ed--I knew we shouldn't have gotten all hippy-trippy and made placenta soup! Damn it.

    @Marcie--Exactly! It's nice that your kids are cute and all, but I'm not really friends with them...I'm friends with you. (Or used to be, anyway.)

    @DiPi--My techniques are becoming ever more diabolical as I learn to exploit the twins' cuteness for my own self-promotion.

    @Steamy--I guess I should put a warning on that link or something. Anyway, I agree with you about the pictures. I often sit gazing at them longingly as my kids tear up the house. Re: the first photo--I think it's really the number of f-stops she took on the way to the aspect ratio that made it so pretty.

    @Karen--Thanks! I hope you had a great Christmas too!

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  8. @Beta: so its the text? get SIL to write them 4 ya.. lol...oops, nix that she'll ask for a commission...:-)

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  9. Baby in a bag! I have a kitten in a uke box but I don't think it's quite the same thing.

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  10. Once upon a time, I did the same for all my friends & relatives. I don't now because, there are simply not enough hours in the day. But I have ample respect for you doing this each and every year.

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  11. Christmas update letters, Holiday photos...I suspect that though you claim to be the Grinch, you are actually Santa in the flesh. (I was hoping for Batman but, oh well)

    By the way, I'm heading over to Aiming Low right now.

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  12. Too (meaning those two are) precious!! Happy Holidays!!

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  13. What do you mean your Christmas cards are lame?

    I know I'm a parent because I didn't send out Christmas cards this year.

    I'm going to sign them all and send them out next November.

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  14. I'm with Sarah P I didn't send out any this year also. I think the photos are beautiful.

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  15. @KBF--Not even the text so much. Just the subject matter.

    @Elly Lou--That reminds me. I have pics of Stella as a pup curled up in my guitar case. She just climbed in as I was playing and fell asleep. Even as a pup, she barely fit in there. Too bad the quality of the pictures is so poor.

    @Nari--Yeah, I'll probably be singing a different tune next year. Oh yeah, that's another thing that undermines my grinch image--I like to sing Christmas carols. I guess it's mostly the decorations that I don't like.

    @Diplo Daddy--Yeah, well. We'll see how long I can keep it going.

    @Bonnie--I agree! Thanks for noticing!

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  16. Wholly moly. I read your other post, but only after I went and laid down for a half hour because I was overcome by the cuteness.

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  17. Awwwwww. Even though you want us to think of you as Scrooge, you totally come off as a softie. No shame in there my good sir. Your babies are so adorable that they will melt any heart made of stone anyway. Resistance has always been futile.

    Now in time to wish you a Happy New Year!

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  18. Too cute! TOOOOOO CCCCUUUUUTTTEEE!!

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  19. I'm not overly fussed with cards.It's the <A HREF="http://www.tedpack.org/xmasnews.html2>Christmas letters</A> within them that make me giggle.

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  20. There are about 13.7 million single parents in the United States today, and those parents are responsible for raising 21.8 million children. About 84 percent of custodial parents are mothers and 16 percent are fathers. In other words, more than one in six single parents is a man.Learn more visit:

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  21. always good to catch up with your blog. I think I have expended a whole lot of time and energy doing nothing this year.

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  22. those pics are killer! i'm ok with a photo holiday card when it's a quality shot. many that i receive are just a little too casual, if you know what i mean. really people, clean up the mess in the background and comb your kids hair if you're going to mass distribute the photo.

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  23. Your Christmas card was total Lamesville. I told you to send egg rolls!! But these holiday pix are pretty adorable.

    -You Know Who This Is

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  24. Okay, really, really damned cute. You know, I'd say that about 9/10 of the Christmas cards we receive are lame. I try to make ours slightly less lame than others, but really? I like to believe it's the thought that counts. Whatever.

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  25. Very adorable pics. The last one is my favorite.

    Hope your Christmas was great and your new year's is even better.

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  26. That kissing picture is so fantastic.

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  27. Wow. Those are great pictures! I hope you had an awesome Christmas.

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  28. Love it bud... parallels here that get my on edge and giggle!!!

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Don't hold back.

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