Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Phobia

I've got a post on Aiming Low Today.  It's about irrational fears.  You know, Phobias.  It starts a little something like this...

The absolute worst moment, and the one that often kicks off a 48 hour screamfest, is on Wednesday morning, when the great stinking scow makes its way down our alley, a mere forty feet from the playroom in the back of the house.  The playroom that features big glass sliding doors and floor-to-ceiling windows so we can enjoy the view of our weedpatch, frumpy detached garage, and the dusty alley beyond.

When I hear the squeal and hiss of the beast slowing to turn down the alley, the fight-or-flight mechanism in my nervous system cranks into high gear.  There is a tingling of spine, a sharpening of vision, a retraction of vulnerable bits.   At first, this reaction was just preparation for the onslaught of frantic children that would come at me from any and all directions, screaming "JURBAGE CHUCK JURBAGE CHUCK!"

But now it has become something more.

Although I know that the likelihood of a garbage truck crushing our garage, plowing through the deck, smashing into the back of the house, and then pummeling us with its giant green forks is much less likely than us being killed by lightning, or even by lightning bugs, I have developed a primal fear of that machine.  My grownup, logical brain is, of course, able to overcome the reptilian lower functions within a few seconds; but at that terrible instant when the truck releases a psshht of extra pneumatic brake pressure, I'm as jumpy as a feral cat.

read more...


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You know what?  I had another post on Aiming Low Last week, but I didn't do the thing I always do--like I just did above--where I link it from here.  I was too distracted by being in New Orleans.  In case you're interested, here's a link to last week's Aiming Low post.

3 comments:

  1. I would have the same fear, if I were you. My grandparents used to have a house with a detached garage that was in the alley, and one time it was plowed into by a snow plow! Machines are scary, and drivers today can't be trusted. But as rational adults, we have to set a good example to our kids and not scream :)

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  2. Poop in the tub, dude. You've earned it. That was a fantastic post.

    Have you tried going all the way down there so they can see it up close? Or would that just scar them forever?

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  3. MMALA--That's messed up! I hardly ever scream when I see big machines.

    Frank--I've tried to let them see the truck up close. We were riding trikes in the alley one day when it came, and as long as I held the kids, they were okay. But it stirred up so much dust that we couldn't really hang out there.

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Don't hold back.

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